reposing | a nocturne of recollection

a nocturne of recollection

It was with deep reluctance that they all parted ways. After all, he loathed to think that he would never see anyone else again, and in particular--

In particular, his heart had wrenched at the very thought he'd never see Connor again. He could not live with that idea, refused to accept it. How horridly unfair it is that he's been teased with this? To be given such love in his heart for another, only to have it stolen away. His life cannot be confined to a miserable, lonely existence in Wallachia.

So he'd promised. He would find Connor, even if it took years for him. Even if it took centuries, he would find him.

What he hadn't anticipated upon was forgetting upon returning to Wallachia. Everything, but the inkling that he had a task to do, something he had to fulfill after defeating his father. He couldn't say what it was, but it was comforting to know that he had something to look forward to even after committing patricide.

That in itself had been difficult. However, with the help of his hunter and scholar, the deed was eventually accomplished. Shortly after, the memory returned.

The station. Familiar faces. A promise.

So he committed himself to it. To finding the right combination of magic and science to transport him to another reality. After the passing of Sypha and Trevor, he knew there was nothing left for him in Wallachia. Both his parents dead, his friends dying of old age, and it meant he could fully commit himself to leaving. It took quite sometime, even some mistakes along the way, but eventually, there was success.

In a burst of lightning tearing through space-time, his father's castle appears in the middle of Lake St. Clair. Not terribly far from Detroit, though he knows little of the city itself except for what he remembers Connor telling him, what images he could share. Though it's been a few centuries for Alucard, he couldn't be sure how long it's been. From the looks of things, it shouldn't have been long at all for Connor.

Now it's just a matter of finding him.

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Six months.

It had been six very chaotic, very insane months since Connor had booted up feeling a little but off. The memory of the station had been locked away without him even realizing it.

To be fair, hours after 'returning' he'd been infiltrating Jericho, officially choosing to become deviant, and then breaking into the CyberLife tower to help lead a revolution.

Sorting out one strange, confusing feeling from another was something he found himself dealing with on an almost hourly basis and the odd feeling of deja vu that sprung up was usually shrugged off. The hints were there, just out of reach, but he hardly knew himself after all.

"You listening? You fucking aren't, are you?" Connor tuned in as a fry flew through the air and hit him square in face. Hank the tiniest bit sheepish, but it was obvious he was mostly just trying to hold back a laugh, "Honest to God, Connor, I thought you'd catch that... or dodge. Matrix-style. You alright? You're like a million miles away."

Connor gave the fry that had hit him a disdainful look but ended up shrugging at Hank's eventual heartfelt concern.

"I'm fine. There's been a lot to think about lately," He said apologetically, which received a sage nod of agreement from Hank as he popped a fry into his mouth.

"Why don't you head home? I can finish dinner without you. I'm a big boy, I can eat by myself," Hank teased, giving his partner a smirk, "Go on. Get some rest, or whatever it is you do."

Connor straightened up, thought about it and then nodded, "Thanks. I'll see you tomorrow Hank."

It felt strange going home. It felt strange having a home. An apartment. An android apartment, a new a booming business for slum lords. What was better than a tenant who didn't really even need a kitchen or bathrooms after all?

He could have called a cab but, at some point, he'd decided that the warm breeze and darkening night sky would help clear his mind. Without realizing how long he'd been walking, he ended up in the little park by the bridge, the sun now long since set.

As the sun sets, Alucard is relieved of it. He can tolerate it for a time, but gradually the migraine sets in and he does become weaker to it. Night is coming to claim time now, and it is fully welcoming as he continues to explore the streets of Detroit, attempting to determine what to do next.

From what little details he's gleaned, not much time has gone on here in comparison to what Alucard has experienced. For him, he's spent so many years in his own world working out ways to travel to another realm entirely. Here, it's been but months. He wonders how matters ended up working out for Connor.

He prays to whatever merciful deity would listen that the android still lives.

Eventually, as the night settles in, he finds himself at a quaint park. He's lost, but without concern to it; he isn't in any danger, and he must familiarize himself with this place anyway if he must call it home now.

Though perhaps it was meant to be this way. He looks ahead in the dim light, his heart leaping and pleasant anxieties filling him as he finally sees who he's been searching for.

"Connor," he whispers, unable to prevent the warm smile forming on his face. Without hesitation, without thinking he immediately goes to approach the android, reaching out with familiarity as he affectionately brushes his fingers over Connor's cheek.

"You're just as beautiful as I remember you to be."

Connor is leaning against the rail, watching the inky black water of the river rather than looking across it at the lights of the city. It's both calming and mesmerizing.

Usually, he's acutely aware of his surroundings, but tonight his thoughts are elsewhere and he doesn't hear Alucard approach at all until he thinks he hears his name spoken quietly and turns to give the source a questioning look.

He leans back a little, obviously confused and surprised to be seeing someone reaching out to touch his face.

Vocal recognition: ........ positive.
Facial recognition: ........ positive.
IdentITy01y1 ...,. -partition error; memory not found-.... scann1ing...

He took a half step back, LED flickering rapidly, a mix of yellow and red.

"Who...?"

The way Connor moves back from him breaks his heart a little, but he knows it was possible. His own eagerness had gotten ahead of him, his own wish to desperately see him again. To express how much he loves, how he'd kept his promise.

Still, he'd hoped that the memories would return after enough time.

Alucard lets out a soft sigh. "Forgive me. I was too hasty."

More than Connor will know. His hand withdraws back into his coat and he does his best to keep the hurt from his eyes. "My name is Adrian Ţepeş. I have also gone by Alucard. We've met sometime ago, but it is possible that you may have forgotten-- that your memory is corrupted to some degree."

"Adrian..." Repeating the name stirred something, flashes of memories. Dirty metal corridors, blood. Strangely, the impressions he got from the memories weren't negative. He couldn't yet recall how they'd met, but he could vividly remember the sensation of Alucard's fingers brushing over his face, the feeling of his lips pressing lightly against his LED.

Connor blinked at him, unsure how to process the bombardment of half-formed memories, but he nodded in agreement when Alucard mentioned that they'd met some time ago.

"I...- You're correct. I can only remember fragments. I don't understand," He mumbled, taking a step closer. Hesitantly, he reached out for Alucard's hand, holding his own out and hoping that Alucard would take it, "I remember you.... Sort of."

Patiently and terribly, terribly hopefully he waits, watching Connor process the entire affair. To his relief, Connor confirms, at least somewhat. With restraint, Alucard takes the android's hand, gently rolling his thumb over Connor's knuckles affectionately. It's hard to hold back from wanting more affection, but he can't throw too much onto this.

"A last petty joke from where we'd been, no doubt," Alucard says flatly. No love is lost for the station, but he is glad for who it allowed him to meet and know. "I forgot at first as well. Eventually, my memories did return to me. And I remembered what I needed to do."

He hesitates, then asks, "Do you remember what I promised you?"

The touch sparks something, his skin receding to reveal the white plastic as if his system was trying desperately to connect to Alucard, to access his memories. He wanted to remember. It felt like there was something... something huge, and deep and meaningful that he'd somehow forgotten. CyberLife? Were they behind this? Had they done something to him?

"Where we'd been?" He looks up at Alucard, canting his head slightly. He had no record that he'd ever left Detroit, "Where... would that be?"

He searched Alucard's face as if he might find answers there, but it was like he had a handful of pieces to a massive puzzle. He didn't know how they connected in the least bit.

He shook his head at the question, a deeply apologetic look pulling at his features.

He's seen Connor do this before, his skin retracting and revealing the beautiful shine of white underneath. The contact doesn't bother him, and instead he waits patiently. He's waited years, a little more time will be nothing.

"A little bit at a time," Alucard advises gently. Though his heart sinks to know that Connor cannot remember what had been promised, he doesn't insist. "I would be glad to explain to you if it's what you wish, but I am concerned how much you would find believable."

He does distinctly recall how much difficulty Connor had with processing the concept of magic, after all. Not that he can blame him, but he knows that likely to Connor and others of his reality, something like the station would be hard to believe.

"We met at a place called Reverie Terminal. Does that sound familiar?"

"None of this seems possible but..." He blinked a few times, eyes becoming unfocused as his LED spun yellow for a moment, "I... remember. Little things. I believe you. I don't know how any of this is possible, but I know you're telling me the truth."

His head cants to the side and he blinks again, this time his gaze moved to focus on Alucard, meeting his eyes. The black expanse of space, star systems that didn't match anything he had on record, a planet, water, an alien ocean and a small campfire.

"Y-yes? Maybe. There was an elevator, right? And a large... window? An observation deck?" These memories almost felt like the snippets of memories he could forcibly pull from other androids when he interfaced with them. But they were distinctly his. At least, they felt like they were.

"There are a lot of things that occurred that did not seem possible," he agrees softly. "I want to tell you everything, but you may not believe even most of what I say. Not that I could blame you for it."

So he considers how to phrase it, smiling faintly to himself that Connor does remember a few things. Distant memories slowly surfacing. Gently, he squeezes the android's fingers, meaning to be affectionate.

"Yes. All those things. When you first arrived there, we met in the bar. I gave you a list of events that transpired, so we could attempt to unravel why we were there and what was happening. You were also kind enough to test the food available on the station for me in order to determine if it was safe for consumption. Does that sound familiar?"

He should get to the part of reminding him that he is a dhampir, but that honestly may be a bit much at the moment.

He tried, but failed, to remember anything about his apparent arrival. There were stars, a black expanse of unknown star systems, and a planet. He remembered those. They were surprisingly vivid. But he didn't recall a bar or their first meeting.

The mention of testing brought back a flood of information, unlocking old records, compilations of data regarding... blood? Alucard was correct when it came to his hope that this path of memories would lead to Connor remembering what he was. His LED flickered yellow as his eyes widened slightly.

"Yes. I remember. And..." His LED flickered more, "You were going to have to stop your father? Did you accomplish what you needed to do? I remember that you were worried... and injured."

Still holding tightly onto Alucard's hand, he raised his other hand to run his fingers over Alucard's shirt, following the deep wound that he'd been recovering from when they'd first met.

A small huff of air escapes Alucard as he feels Connor's touch on his chest. That, as well, has been a habit of the android's, though hardly one that he could mind. It doesn't help his desire to lean in and kiss him; he's determined to not overwhelm Connor. For now, holding his hand is enough, and the bits of memories he's recalling.

"I healed, eventually," he says softly, reassuring. "I was successful in stopping my father. I am not overjoyed in having assisted in killing him, but it was necessary. After that, I was free to live. I wanted nothing more than to see you again."

It has been years and years, but the regret he has regarding his father has not faded much. It is simply another burden to carry, but less dismal than if he had no hope to look forward to. As torturous as the station had been at times, it had also given Alucard a shred of hope to hold onto. Hope for humans, and hope for himself.

"And you? I wondered what might have become of you and your partner. I'd like to know what has happened since I saw you last. You were concerned about your mission as well. You mentioned once that you had spoken to an Elijah Kamski before we met?"

Connor's LED spun, a pale blue light flickering more noticeably than ever against the surrounding darkness that had descended on the park, processing every word as it was spoken.

He remembered magic, impossibilities, and hearing about Alucard's world, far in the past and intertwined with fantastical sounding creatures. If Connor required breath, it would have caught when Alucard mentioned having nearly immediately started to try reunite with him.

"1475..." The number tumbles out of his mouth before he could quite remember what it was, "You've been looking for me for 564 years?"

It was shocking. He knew Alucard wasn't a human, but still, that amount of time... It was difficult to wrap his head around, difficult to believe he meant so much to this man. Difficult to believe, but deeply touching.

"I- We're still partners," Although his smile was subtle, it's fondness spoke volumes about how important Hank was in his life.

"My mission..." His LED flickered yellow briefly as he glanced away, "Technically, I failed. Or succeeded..." Since Amanda had implied that they'd intended him to fail all along.

"It's a little complicated. I'm happy to explain it all to you, or try to," He turned to look at the empty park over his shoulder and then back at Alucard, "We could remain here or I could tell you while we make our way to my apartment... or, if you have a place...?"

It warms him to know that slowly, the memories are indeed returning to Connor, and Alucard does not hide his smile, faint and subtle as it is. He closes his eyes and nods once at the question. "More or less," he says softly. "It took me sometime to get the magic right. The science right. I regret none of it, now that I am here. I have no duty I am tied to -- just what my heart wants. That, I can be patient for."

He has no jealousy toward Hank. Though their interactions had been brief, in a lot of ways Hank reminds him of Trevor: gruff, their skins made thick because of how cruel the world can be, soft when it counts the most. That and the alcohol, of course.

"I'm glad you two are still close," Alucard says honestly. "He is a good man."

The dhampir steps closer to Connor, but makes no other demands of his space otherwise. It's been centuries; he can wait a bit longer for whenever Connor is ready for him. "I suppose I technically have somewhere I can stay, but I would prefer to go to your apartment with you. Please, lead the way."

It's not as if he has any plans to return to his father's castle anytime soon. This is where he will stay, as far as he's concerned.

There's a brief flicker of yellow that Alucard likely wouldn't miss, especially not in the dark. Magic. The word immediately butts up against his programming and is rejected. He remembers things though, things that had no explanation. The universe where they had been had different rules then this one. The place Alucard was from had different rules as well.

"I agree. I couldn't ask for a better partner," He said earnestly. Or a better friend and mentor. Hank might not act like it, but he was actually pretty patient with him and Connor had always appreciated how blunt Hank was when Connor did something wrong. Overall it worked out quite well.

Connor can't help smile softly, subtle but it reaches his eyes, when Alucard steps closer.

He gave the dhampir a nod and kept their hands linked as his LED flickered yellow for a moment, calling a cab. While waiting, he began to tell Alucard about Jericho and about Markus and about infiltrating the CyberLife tower and awakening the other androids. He wasn't entirely sure if CyberLife had intended that part to happen, which brought him to what Amanda had said when CyberLife had tried to resume complete control over him.

He glanced over toward the street and nodded toward the cab, leading Alucard to it and opening the door for him before sliding in afterwards.

"I've replayed the events many times in my head and I'm still unsure what was planned and what occurred outside of the things CyberLife predicted I would do..." His LED flickered again as he frowned, "It's... disconcerting that they made me, planning that I would fail..."

The way Connor's LED shifts its color in response to the mention of magic, and for a moment Alucard smiles wryly. That in particular brings back memories, how difficult it'd been for Connor to process certain aspects of magic, if any at all. Alucard has been more than willing to try to explain a few times, but ultimately some things with magic are hard to process, especially when Connor is so largely based on science. He can't fault him for that.

He listens to Connor's explanation, feeling a swell of pride knowing that Connor had undoubtedly made the correct choice. Gently, he squeezes the android's hand, very clearly pleased with him despite hearing what ultimately Amanda -- and by extension, CyberLife -- had to say about his deviancy.

"Either you agreed you were alive and they would attempt to take control, or you agreed you were a machine and did exactly as they asked. Perhaps CyberLife found it to be a matter of winning no matter what they did." Alucard sits closely to Connor, not shy about it, but willing to give him space if there's any indication of discomfort. "Not that I had any doubts about you. If anything, I see it as CyberLife conceding it was inevitable that you would realize what you are."

There is a pause, then he asks gently, "And Amanda? You have no connection to this A.I. any longer?"

Connor glances away, looking out the window at the buildings zipping by without actually seeing any of them, deep in thought. Had he been damned either way?

"I didn't realize they had those kinds of capabilities... but I should have. I nearly cost a lot of androids their lives. I did cost a lot of androids their lives," Even if it hadn't been his choice, he'd led CyberLife to Jericho and he'd come dangerously close to assassinating Markus.

After a moment, he nodded, leaning closer to Alucard, subconsciously searching for some physical reassurance.

"Sometimes I wonder if they designed me to deviate..." Designed him to fail, "No. Amanda is gone. And the Zen Garden... I can still go there but it's just ice and polygons."

Once he feels Connor shift closer, he finally dares a bit more. Alucard slips his arm around Connor's shoulders, leaning in to press his forehead against the android's temple. He would give him everything, or hold back as much as Connor needs of him.

"It doesn't matter how they designed you. You are your own man now. You are as I always knew you to be: you are alive." He pauses, then he offers gently, "Not that I say this to dismiss your concerns and feelings. I know too well being concerned what one lives to do, or is fated to commit. Either by design, or by fate."

Amanda is gone. Good. He knows only what Connor has told him, but an A.I. designed to essentially guilt him never sat well with Alucard.

"I waited hundreds of years to meet you again, because you are very dear to me, Connor. That is the kind of person you are."

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a nocturne of recollection

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