goneforawalk: (love enough and you'll start to bleed)
alucard. ([personal profile] goneforawalk) wrote in [personal profile] reposing 2019-04-05 01:19 am (UTC)

GUESS WHAT IT'S A TEXT.

i apologize for being so flippant about death

i don't know how to put into words how i feel about things but living is... very difficult, for me

my existence as a person is conditional: i am no longer a human, naturally, but i am also no longer even a vampire in that for all intents and purposes i am little more than an object to be used at the whims of my master

integra is the only master that has treated me as something more than a horrible lab experiment and an inconsequential weapon, but she is human, will always be human, and will leave the world without an heir

when she dies, the government is taking over my "contract"

which means all i have to look forward to upon returning home is being locked in a tiny box indefinitely by men frightened of my power with no escape possible

i don't... look forward to an eternity of more torture and imprisonment

i can't

don't tell anyone that's what's going to happen to me when i go back

i didn't want people to know, really

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