( it is not the answer that vanessa wishes she could give. if she knew the name it would be one that she would tell to him. if only she knew that the name, and the reason that they both desired her, was hidden in her memories. repressed. she turns to look at him now though does not move any closer, more a wounded need of protection than a mistrust of him )
( there was a pause for a few seconds. it was not easy. it was a difficult weight that she carried, particularly so alone, but there it was. it was not the whole story, it never was, but the rest was to be discovered in time )
I have told no other here.
( she knows that he's to be trusted with a secret -- he had his own )
( they both know that alucard didn't have to tell her about his goals, particularly with the reaction that vanessa had had to him. the fact that he had, that their discussion following had been amicable, had said much of both of them )
It is something, knowing that another understands the curses we face. Few would.
( the words are a whisper though there's emotion to them -- sentiment, care. she hadn't expected his opinion to ever be important and she found that she was genuinely touched by his words )
Until then I am glad that the worry is not here. No one else needs to be pulled into my troubles.
( had he not been patient he would not have understood her, not allowed her the chance to attempt to understand him, to find her own patience )
Being from different worlds can make us feel more alone than we are. ( at least vanessa feels that deeply. even with people she'd known at home, she'd felt so alone at times ) But we are all trying to find our way home.
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( it is not the answer that vanessa wishes she could give. if she knew the name it would be one that she would tell to him. if only she knew that the name, and the reason that they both desired her, was hidden in her memories. repressed. she turns to look at him now though does not move any closer, more a wounded need of protection than a mistrust of him )
They were cast out by God.
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[Alucard isn't certain how to respond to that last line. God has no love for beings like him, but God was not meant for anything but humans.
He keeps his distance now, not wishing to make her feel cornered.]
As fallen angels tend to be, I gather.
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( unless she had seriously missed something )
But I wanted you to know.
( to understand, to explain. because she'd found some measure of almost trust in him )
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[To him, it seems possible, in any case.
He pauses at her next words, his expression softening.]
That is... Rather, I appreciate that, Vanessa. I know telling me was not easy.
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( there was a pause for a few seconds. it was not easy. it was a difficult weight that she carried, particularly so alone, but there it was. it was not the whole story, it never was, but the rest was to be discovered in time )
I have told no other here.
( she knows that he's to be trusted with a secret -- he had his own )
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Alucard takes in a deep breath.]
And I will not tell any. I will keep it to myself.
Your trust is more appreciated than I can truly say.
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( they both know that alucard didn't have to tell her about his goals, particularly with the reaction that vanessa had had to him. the fact that he had, that their discussion following had been amicable, had said much of both of them )
It is something, knowing that another understands the curses we face. Few would.
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[It does warm him slightly to know how much she's come around. She didn't have to; she could have continued to begrudge him and what he is.
But she decided to do otherwise.
Mother was right. He knows this, but it is validating to experience it.]
I hope you are victorious should you ever return to your homeland, Vanessa.
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( the words are a whisper though there's emotion to them -- sentiment, care. she hadn't expected his opinion to ever be important and she found that she was genuinely touched by his words )
Until then I am glad that the worry is not here. No one else needs to be pulled into my troubles.
( and they all had enough to be concerned with )
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[For him, the thought of Wallachia and his father plagues him. Alucard is under a strict timeline that he hopes to beat.
But for Vanessa, for others -- despite being in such a place like this, perhaps it is almost freeing in a way. He wishes he could agree.]
I'm glad we have met. It is easy to become discouraged at times, but with you, I must remember that an understanding can be made between people.
I must remain patient.
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You gave me that opportunity.
( had he not been patient he would not have understood her, not allowed her the chance to attempt to understand him, to find her own patience )
Being from different worlds can make us feel more alone than we are. ( at least vanessa feels that deeply. even with people she'd known at home, she'd felt so alone at times ) But we are all trying to find our way home.